The Riddle of Love

I read a funny quote the other day. It went like this: "You don't actually love a person unless you occasionally want to kill them."

Which made me start to wonder...

Why do we put such high expectations on those we love most? Why do we take out our problems on the ones we would never want to lose?

The answer could simply be that you start spending so much time with that person, that it's nearly impossible not to come across a situation you don't see eye-to-eye on. Or maybe we have such high expectations for that person because we would be willing to do that much for them.

I also read a quote that said "Love is spending the rest of your life with someone you want to kill, but not doing it because you'd miss them."

Maybe we have this image  of love in our minds due to the romantic movies, or the advertisements shown daily. In a Bible study I went to recently, the speaker talked about how in most movies, the ending is of the glamorous wedding. The movie skips right over the part where the wife gains 40 pounds and the husband loses his job.

 I guess I'm slowly learning that the part the movies skip over, is what defines love the most. Love means you're a team. Love means that no matter the circumstance, you are in it together. Love means that you don't have to worry about the other person giving up when things get hard.

I can think of a time, where I was yelling at my mom and she simply said "Wait, why are you taking your bad day out on me?"

 I didn't get it then, but it's so obvious now. It's like I was trying to make the world feel sorry for me, and the only way I found that possible, was to bring the people around me right down with me. Even though I was yelling, and even though I was not being easy to love, she looked passed my anger; she looked beyond my bad day....showing me love.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that when you love someone you can't expect everyday to be perfect. If you do, you're never going to be satisfied. You have to realize that there are going to be days that you want to "kill" that person. Yet, if it's true love, the good days will, by far, outweigh the bad. Plus, it's getting through those bad days together that creates the best love stories.

Let it snow, Let it snow, Let it snow

I'll be honest...I've never been a huge fan of snow. Sure, it's pretty and Christmas wouldn't be the same without it...but I'd be perfectly happy getting an inch on Christmas Eve and then having it all disappear January 1st.

So, a couple days ago when the weather man came on TV saying to expect 3-8 inches of that white stuff, I wasn't very happy.

That is until Monday morning...

Sure, I spent Sunday looking out my window thinking...why.....why this early....now how am I going to get to class....now I have to scrape my car....now I have to shovel....now I have to leave earlier to get anywhere on time....

Without really realizing...I was focusing on all of the negative things.

Sunday night after being pumped about the Packers victory, I looked out the window watching the snow STILL falling...and felt my mood change. I really wasn't ready for winter.

Which brings me to Monday morning.

I woke up to this annoying sound... something was scraping against my wall. When I looked out my window I was reminded of that nasty cold stuff piled up everywhere, but the next image might have changed my outlook on that white stuff forever.

After looking beyond the snow, I noticed that the noise I was hearing, was of a nice old man shoveling a path from my steps to the sidewalk. Of course, this view warming my heart. I went on getting ready when I heard a noise coming from my steps....I ran to that side of the house and noticed the old man was now shoveling off my 15 billion steps.

The most beautiful thing about this, is that this man didn't have to do this. He didn't have to think of the girl that lives in the tan house. When I signed my lease I specifically remember it saying I was responsible for the sidewalk and steps outside of my house.

As if that wasn't enough....When I got home today, my steps were salted down and a little bucket sat there labeled "Salt for Ice".

Maybe snow isn't so bad...As I walked down my cleared steps, making my way through the thoughtful shoveled path, I also saw a man helping a women who had just slipped; I saw a girl taking a picture of the snow-covered trees. I also saw a family building a snowman.

Today at the Preschool, a little girl came up to me as I was helping another child make a snow angel. This little girl looked at me innocently and said, "Isn't there something magical about snow?"

I thought to myself... Yes, yes there is.

The Christmas List

The joyful music, the lights & the contagious spirit...these are just a few of the things that make this time of year so magical.
 
I recently was looking back at some home videos where my mom sat my brother and I down in front of the tree to ask us what we wanted Santa to bring us. Granted I was five and my brother was seven, I wished for things like a puppy, an American Girl doll, and a pretend cash register. My brother asked for a football, a real Packer jersey, and a BB gun. I'd be lying if I said Christmas still brings that much excitement to me, but I'd also be lying if I said Christmas means any less today.
 
I believe that as we grow up, things change. Our thoughts, our beleifs, and our views all alter depending on our experiences.  This year when my mom asked me to make a Christmas list, I found myself struggling. Yes, there are a few things that would be nice to have, but do I really need them? Are the things I "need" really something my parents can just go out and buy in the stores, or Santa's elves can make in their workshop?
 
Yes, when I was five years-old, while wishing for material things, there were people struggling, people that were poor, and hospitals full of ill people...but as children we are so egocentric.
 
The bittersweet thing about growing up... we realize that this Jolly guy dressed in red can't logically fly around the world in one night, while checking off our Christmas list.
 
Therefore, our lists change, our views alter. As I grow up, I'm realizing that it's not the items I have that brings me my happiness.
 
This year my imaginary Christmas list would consist of:
 
1. Groceries for a year
2. My loans paid off
3. Good health
4. Family time/traditions
5. Happiness for all
6. Okay....a puppy.....
 
I want to make sure this year, that I don't get caught up on the materialistic part of Christmas. Sometimes I find myself sad after Christmas is over. Like something is lost or missing.
 
So, why can't we all carry this contagious, joyful, magical spirit through out the year? The friendly smiles, the small acts of kindness...if you haven't noticed, money can't buy you everything.
 
And if money could by us everything, would the value be the same?

Father Time

I can't believe that my last post was in May...

It's funny. When I started typing these posts I found it so relaxing, but that crazy thing called life gets in the way and suddenly there is no time.

Time is a funny thing. Just think about it. It guides our every move. (I bet you just looked down at the time on your computer screen, or maybe your phone. Are you on schedule?) Sometimes we want time to just stop or freeze. I'm sure we all have that one moment (or five) that we want to last forever, or put it in a bottle and keep it for a later date. Other times the clock can't go fast enough. Each second feeling like a life time.

At the preschool the other day it was the Director's birthday. She was turning 60. We surprised her by having all the children sing Happy Birthday to her when she entered the room. Afterwards, the children were asked how old they thought she was. One little girl, responded "Two?" Another boy, shot his hand up confidently, "You are 21!"

Isn't it funny how children really have no sense of time? I know that they are too young to really grasp the concept, but I think that's wonderful. I miss that time. When I had no idea what the day of the week was, or what time of the day it was. Each day was just filled with excitement and many new things.

Today, I walked passed a woman who looked particularly sad...I thought to myself... We never really know what the person is going through that we're walking past, or sitting by in the cafeteria, or standing next to in line. That person could have just had the best day of their life getting to see a loved one, or they could have had the worst day of their life losing a loved one. The point is, we never know what storm God has asked the people we pass each day to go through. We don't know what their story entails.

Some of us carry our hearts on our sleeves, while others build up unbreakable walls. No matter what, we all have problems, we all have worries, but we also all have happiness and joy in something. Alot of the time, how we handle these ups and downs is by using our time wisely. Who knows what tomorrow brings.

So, smile at that person walking by. That may brighten their day for that one moment. And that one moment could be all that they needed. And in that moment, is time. Time to show them, that you too have worries, you too have struggles, but we're all in this together.

The Jealousy Monster

What is terrible, stupid, and potentially harmful? Jealousy. Whether or not we like to admit it, we all have experienced this feeling. Whether it is because of someone's adorable new hair cut, or someone looking at your man a little too long.

Especially this time of the year, jealousy sky rockets...at least for me. Everyone is showing off their swim suit bods and their goddess tan. If you're anything like me, you see that the swim suit section is out at Target and you want to turn the other way.

The thing that takes us longer to realize, is that we are perfect the way that we are. There will always be someone we think is prettier, taller, smarter, funnier.... But if we have confidence in our strengths....jealousy will come and go quite quickly.

I think it's human nature to compare. At preschool we spent a whole week with "comparing" as our theme. Of course, not comparing the children, but experimenting with bigger, smaller, taller & shorter...

If we put as much effort into thinking positively as we did into comparing and becoming jealous, we would have crazy big egos. Let's make it a goal this summer, to shift our thoughts. Each morning pick out one thing you love about yourself and always remember to complement others...after all, we all have insecurities.

& remember...when you are looking at someone thinking "Gosh, I love her dress...." that same person might be looking at you thinking..."I wish I had her eyes...."

We all are beautiful. handsome. cute. adorable. sexy.

It's up to us to enhance the positive, think positive, and embrace the positive. Like Dr. Seuss says....

"Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."

Now go out & enjoy the life, body, and self that you were blessed with!

You find out who your friends are.

You don't know what you have until it's gone.

For weeks I had been telling myself to back up my documents on a hard drive... yet, I kept putting it on my "to do" list everyday, but the funny thing was....I found it on my list everyday...with no checkmark by it.

Let's just say today, I took the 10 minutes out of my day to finally do it. Why you ask? My laptop went missing at 2:30 this afternoon. Did you just get a panic feeling just thinking about it? Well, that doesn't even begin to describe the feeling until it is actually you. Trust me.

I never realized how dependant I was on one small device...all of a sudden I was wondering how I would ever type up that 6 page paper that was worth 15% of my grade...or how I would register for Benchmark II without any of my documents from my past classes...and all of a sudden all of my notes I had been taking, were instantly gone. All because of one device gone missing.

The funny thing was, Facebook didn't even cross my mind once while in panic mode.

I was supposed to be meeting a friend for dinner when I realized it was missing. I started to panic...I went as far as checking under my bed....With the help of my amazing friend I started to retrack my every move of the day. I remembered that it was in a classroom...long story short....my friend drove me to that classroom and it was pitch dark and locked. A helpful professor near by said I would have to wait an hour for a janitor to arrive, because she didn't have a key either. Have you ever had to wait an hour for something while panicking!?!? What did you do?

I called my mom.

I honestly don't know where I would be without my mom. People say I'm a spitting image and I proudly agree. She's the person I can go to for anything & instantly feel like everything will be okay. Let's just say I'm truly blessed. She quickly had me sucking up my tears & thinking positive. My friend hugged me and insisted we go to get some chocolate while we wait. (How did she know that was the next thing to make me feel better) Another part of the story cut short......my friend graciously bought me chocolate & we found the caring janitor who opened the door and there.......right where I had placed it.......was my "you don't know what you have until it's gone" laptop!!!!!

I can now say I've kissed a laptop.

I instantly called my parents to celebrate. (If I were them, I would have gotten rid of me a long time ago) ;) So what's the real point of the story? At the time I was panicking and frantically planning out how I would explain it to my teacher...but now I realize that if I wouldn't have gone through that, I may never have "checked" the hard drive off of my "to do" list& something worse could have happened. I may never have realized that even if I cause my parents stress....they are going to be here through anything. And lastely, I never would have seen just how great my new friend is. She had homework, she had her own "to do" list... but she promised she wouldn't leave until we found my laptop.

There is no better feeling than knowing people care. I am one who always wants to help & give back. Later on that night that same friend got a phone call saying one of her family members was sick. I can honestly say that before tonight, I would not have really known how to empathize with her (i've never been very good at that) but after the crazyness of the day, I knew that she needed a hug & someone to set their homework aside & just be there. & that is exactly what I did.

Moral of the story: Back up your documents, don't leave your laptop anywhere, & count your blessings.

Must love dogs.

They say that a dog is a man's best friend. Which explains why losing one is like losing a family member. Three years ago in March, I had to put my Golden Retriever, Tucker down. I can honestly say, it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. He was a brother to me. And not a day goes by that I don't think about him. Especially when we have scraps left over after dinner, or when I walk in the door and he's not there to greet me. 

There's a joke that goes: put your wife and your dog in the trunk for an hour and see which one is happy to see you when you finally let them out. 

A dog is always there no matter what...when you are ugly, sad, happy, or mad. They go through every change, emotion, and day with you. Communicating with a dog is unlike anything else. They don't judge, they don't assume...they just listen and wag their tale. Yet, some how you know that they understand.

A few weeks ago, my mom said that a little girl came to our door with a lost golden retriever on a leash. The girl asked if it was our dog. My mom sadly said no, but as she looked to see if the collar had a name/address on it, she noticed that the dogs name was Tucker...(if that wasn't a sign to get a new puppy, I don't know what is). When I see a dog that looks like Tucker, I always think that he should know me and come up to greet me like he used to.

I am not quite sure what it is that I miss about a dog. The company, the pillow, the foot warmer, the left-over disposal, the walking partner, the protector, the newspaper fetcher, the alarm clock, the door greeter, the non-judgemental listener, the shower licker, the vacuum, that friend that never talks back, but always makes you feel like everything will be okay.

 A dog and the owner's connection is virtually unknown in human relationships because it is wordless. It's not always easy and it sometimes starts out frustrating--yet it's a love that has no less of a value, just because one of the partners walk on four legs.

Before you get a dog you can't quite imagine what living with one might be like; afterward, you can't imagine living any other way.

Let's talk Love.

"Once upon a time..." & "They lived happily ever after." Two phrases that everyone relates to love. Sadly, these days the second phrase "they lived happily ever after" is changing to "and they lived kind of happy for a few months/years then got a divorce." Doesn't quite have the ring to it now does it?

Every day on Facebook there is someone "now in a relationship...or so and so is now single." 

A friend and I were talking and I said "well they aren't facebook official...." Then we started to laugh because what does that even mean? People say the three word phrase of "I love you" after 2 weeks of dating now a days.....Something that is supposed to be so special.

I have been absolutely blessed with inspiring role models in my life. My mom's parents have been married almost 60 years and my dad's parents will be celebrating their 50th anniversary this summer. My parents also will be married 26 years this year! My aunts and uncles also follow the trend, most being married 20 plus years.When I think about that....it comforts me. It shows that it's possible. No, I didn't say easy. I said possible. Love can last.

Everyone has a purpose. If everything went perfect, the world would be boring. Being in love means being patient, learning from arguments, being honest with each other, leaning on eachother when things get rough, giving each other space when space is needed, and teaching eachother to laugh along the way.

One of my favorite movies is "The Notebook" and what Noah says is perfect:

"It's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day."


Not only is it beautiful because Ryan Goseling says it....but because it's what true love entails & who doesn't want to hear those words. Just think, 50 years...... FIFTY. With the same person. & the best part is, my grandpa still makes my grandma laugh & holds the door for her. Just think of everything that happens in fifty years....and then think about going through it with your best friend.

Everyone of you reading this, is already a Cinderella/Prince and I have faith that your story will end: "And they lived happily ever after."  

What do you want to be when you grow up?

Today I over heard a girl talking about how she wants to switch majors (her's is education) because she's never going to get paid enough and her time will be wasted. Personally, I think that if that is the attitude she is going in with...she should switch. Being a teacher isn't about the pay or the "benefits". It's about the love for children. It's about going to class with a positive attitude, to shape children's future and see them grow. I do find myself thinking...man, I'm gonna have to marry rich to survive, but then I remember that life isn't all about money, but more importantly about doing what makes you happy. I have numerous projects from elementary school that say "When I grow up...I want to be a teacher." Now I can say, I'm conquering a dream.

Which brings me to my next point. If it wasn't for God giving us different hobbies, interests, and abilities the world would be a boring place. People say..."ah, I don't know how you want to be a teacher..." well I could say "ah, how can you want to work in an office every day." Thank God we all have different views. Imagine if no one wanted to be a doctor, or if only one person had an interest in engineering. The world would stop functioning correctly.

Being different and unique is important. Don't try to fit in with the crowd, do what makes YOU happy, you never know where it will take you until you try. I strongly believe that the happiest people don't have loads of money (although, who wouldn't be happy winning the lottery)...the happiest people are doing things that make them feel like they are making a difference and doing what they love each day--whether it be painting, listening, fixing trucks, reading books. Being low on cash inspires people to be creative, to be resourceful, and to truly appreciate everything that they have. Think about what you are good at, and use it. It's special and not everyone can do it. The world will thank you.

Stop comparing. You are BEAUTIFUL!

How much do you weigh? Now pause. How did you react? This question is highly avoided. It's a number that most women subtract from, while some men add to, to seem "more masculine." Isn't it funny how everyone is labeled and put into categories based on looks alone. "did you see that girl with all that acne?" or "look at that red head." Before ever speaking, we as humans, pass judgement and I am not innocent myself.

Last week, in one of my classes, the girl I sit by said she was feeling very light headed and sick. So, today when we sat down I asked her how she was feeling. "Oh, it was just these new diet pills I'm on, I didn't eat with them because I didn't realize you had to." It instantly made me sad. & here I was eating a cookie. This beautiful girl is already tiny, yet she sees somebody else in the mirror. Who do you see in the mirror? There is a website that I really love and it's called operationbeautiful.com you should visit it.

Also, today on the news, a mom who is in the hospital after losing her legs while protecting her kids from a tornado talked about beauty. Before this she had cared more about her hair and clothes than taking the time to enjoy the simple things like family time and interacting with her children. After going through this, she realized what was important. That made me think.

 Yesterday, I had to go to a meeting and didn't feel like putting on make-up. To be honest, I walked in a little anxious about my looks and the first thing the girl next to me said was "you have really pretty eyes." That was so powerful and an "ah huh" moment. What an amazing compliment. Here I was thinking about the pimple on my chin, when this girl proved to me, I was only focused on the negatives. Which leads me to say, never hesitate to give a compliment. In today's world, insecurity is everywhere and that one positive can change someone's day or maybe even life. Sometimes we need that push to prove to ourselves we are beautiful/handsome. I challenge you to give out 1 compliment a day. Why hide it? I find that making others happy, brings happiness to my life too. Think about it.

CARPE DIEM!

I don't know why, but recently I've been thinking about how precious life is and how in one second, everything can be changed forever. For me, that is so scary to think about. It causes me to be a worry wart, especially in crazy weather like tonight.

In the news there was a story about 4 college girls that were in a car accident, killing all four. Just think about that. Those were someone's daughters, maybe someone's sisters, friends, cousins, granddaughter...& BAM. Gone. Not for the week...but forever.

Now, I don't want to make it sound like I'm afraid of dying & as a Christian, I like to believe that I am going to Heaven, and from what I believe, it's perfect there. (I'm hoping for a couple malls....ice cream shops...and money trees) But the unknown is always scary.

For the past two weeks, I noticed that the girl that usually sits by me in class was gone. Today, she came back and the background of her computer was of the four girls killed in the accident with a big red heart, written inside was "Best Friends Forever". I couldn't help, but let my mind wonder when I saw that. That could have been my face, or even yours. That also could have been you or I putting someone we loved as our background, while our hearts were left aching & our lives forever being changed as well.That morning I had been thinking about how stressed I was and how I couldn't wait for the weekend, but what never crossed my mind was....what if the weekend never came?

Life is precious. Tim Mcgraw said it perfectly, "live like you're dying." But for me, it's not always that easy. I can't just hop on a plane to Africa tomorrow, because while living like I'm dying, I have to plan for the possible future. But that doesn't mean, I can't smile at the people passing by, I can't hold the door for the UPS guy carrying a bunch of boxes, it doesn't mean I can't send random letters to friends and texts to families reminding them how much they mean to me.

Life is bittersweet. Take advantage of every moment and don't forget to smile & enjoy the little things. When it comes to the end, you might not regret the missed tripped to Florida as much as you would, the missed hug from a loved one.

If you're reading this, thank you. Now go show someone that you care. & don't forget to count your blessings along this mysterious adventure we call life.

& in memory of one of my heroes, Mr. Hogan....CARPE DIEM----SEIZE THE DAY.

Public Speaking < Anything else

I'll never forget that day in 7th grade when I was standing up in front of my entire class, and all of a sudden I couldn't speak. I was scared they were judging me, making fun of me in my their minds, and picking apart everything I was saying. That day forever changed me. It's funny...I can remember exactly what I was wearing. A grey Wisconsin sweatshirt with my hair tied back. I went home in a panic wondering if there was something wrong with me. I was so embarrased.

Why do we work ourselves up over the silliest things? So what if they don't agree with what I'm saying, who cares if I screw up on a sentence. I'm human. To this day, I find myself before speaking, questioning if I'm saying it right and making sure I don't make myself look stupid. (which happens often) & you know what....that is what makes memories, and conversations fun. And guess what? I bet most people don't even remember this day in 7th grade, yet I thought it was the end of the world.

I'm going to be a teacher someday. & being up in front of 30 people is going to be a daily task. I admire those that have no fear, that can speak clear and confident, but I'm working towards that!

Tonight I was helping out with some confirmation students here at Stout, and I was assigned a group to talk to about my experiences. For some reason, I wasn't too nervous. I don't know if it was God guiding me, or my confidence growing. When I sat down with these students and started talking, I noticed myself picking up more on the eyes wondering and finger twitching, but hardly noticed when I saw head nods and smiles. Then I remembered that it didn't matter if they didn't agree, or if I wasn't the comedian of the show. I was proud of myself for at least putting myself out there. Once I relaxed, so did the group.

From time to time we have to remind ourselves that changes don't happen over night. It takes experiences and time to change. Not focusing on the negative will give you a more positive outcome. I guess my advice to myself and others seeking a change is: Deep Breath. Happy Thoughts. Patience.

Someone's trash is another's treasure.

After signing a lease for an apartment for next fall, all my mind can think about on it's spare time (and not so spare time) is how I want to decorate! I have always imagined my very own apartment. Somewhere I can express myself and invite people to share with. The funny thing is, I'm a college student and I can hardly afford tuition. A few summers ago my friend and I decided we wanted to go "antiquing" and because of the fun treasures we found, it has now become a tradition. The first time I found a huge, old, turquoise trunk that now is my "memory trunk" and sits at the end of my bed. The next adventure, I found an old window that now hangs above my dresser. Now whenever I see any "we sell antiques here" signs I smile. It wasn't just about the treasures my friend and I found on this trip, it was seeing the history and making memories ourselves.

This past weekend I was at Saver's--a second hand store that never disappoints me. I've never paid more then $8 for anything there and I've bought anything from a vase to a dresser. I LOVE IT. This weekend I found myself a new pair of bright red flats--$3. I learned from my mom...never buy anything unless it's on sale and now, anything over $15 is way too much, but that's okay because I love the search. Thanks Mom.


When I was trying on the cute flats I over heard a mom and her son--I would guess he was about 12 years old.
   
     "Mom, why did someone want to get rid of such an awesome pair of snow pants?" This caught my attention and I immediately looked up and a man next to me was also smiling. I thought to myself...exactly. Perhaps the person giving them away had grown out of them, or gotten a new pair for Christmas, but now this boy had found a treasure. A miny February Christmas. All for probably $4.


It's the simple things in life.


That's my favorite thing about second-hand stores or even garage sales. You never know what you are going to find, but some one's trash has now become your treasure. How wonderful? We can give away things we now see as trash & make it some one's treasure. I guess that goes for a lot of things...like last week for example, I was dumping out some old hot dish and my friend said "wait, are you really going to throw that away?" Immediately I felt greedy for throwing away something that was perfectly good, but it was taking up too much room in my fridge, "I'll take it." she said. Even something as simple as food, can be a treasure. Or how about ex lovers. Come on ladies...don't act like you don't know. Someone you found to be very annoying and over protective can end up being some one's prince charming because they find the characteristics delightful that you had found to be "deal breakers." To each their own, I always say.


Now, some people may walk into savers and not have the patience to dig, or think it smells funny, or maybe they just want non-used items. It really depends on the person. I'm a born-to-be shopper and recent crafter. I like making old into new & putting my "own touches" into the end product. Plus, I find it kind of exciting to know it's been other places.


All I'm sure of, is that the trash you're hoarding or willingly giving away, is waiting to be some one's treasure. So, don't be afraid...you never know what you'll find in return. As for me, I'm going to literally be "walking in someone else's shoes." Cool.
    

Faith. Hope. & Love.

FAITH. Such a simple word, with such a deep meaning. Well, to me anyway. HOPE. A four letter word that gets millions of people through the day. and of course, LOVE. The word every one seeks in some form & can change a person in an instant. I never really thought about these words much before college, but they all connect together. One of my favorite Bible verses is Romans 12:12 "Let your hope make you glad. Be patient in time of trouble & never stop praying." The first time I heard that, it comforted me. Read it again.

So, I pictured college to be a party every night and get to homework if I had time. Now, don't get me wrong, I love to socialize and have a good time, but my fun may be different from yours, & I'm learning that, that is perfectly okay. I tried the Thirsty Thursday thing and all, but I found I'd much rather be with a bunch of close friends, laughing, playing games, and maybe having a few drinks here and there, but to be honest, I'm perfectly fine cuddled up on the couch reading a book on a Thursday night. A favorite quote of mine "Don't feel stupid if you don't like what everyone else pretends to love." I'm not saying people don't honestly enjoy "partying," but I know a lot of people that feel like they "have to" & that makes me sad. I was one of them.

Which brings me to my main point. When I lived with my parents we went to church every Sunday and I prayed here and there, but getting to college opened my eyes. I was on my own. I could skip church, I could skip class, I could have ice cream for breakfast. But what I found funny, was I didn't want to do those things. I liked how things were. The first few weeks were tough for me, I'll be honest. I was home sick and a lot of my new friends didn't have the same "idea of fun," and I wasn't sure I was in the right major.

So, I prayed.

At this time I was looking for an apartment for the following year and was stressed about not having a roommate, then I was stressed because I never was in a spot with "no close friends" before & was constantly wondering if I was in the right major.

So, God answered.

That Monday, I met this nice girl in the waffle line at lunch. We talked and laughed, but never exchanged names. That same week I got a job at the "Child Care Center" and met an amazing teacher that kept telling me I needed to switch my major, because "I was a natural teacher." Then, when walking to class I got an e-mail saying there was a "Catholic Newman Organization" that week. Long story short, a few days passed and I had a lot of hope with my new job & all. I patiently waited for that "Newman" get together because I knew it'd help my faith grow. That night that I walked to that new organization, I saw the "waffle" girl, and the priest announced that there was an opening for an apartment that the church was renting out for next year. After that week, how couldn't I believe!?

I apologize for such a long post, but it's something I really wanted to share. Now, every morning I read a verse out of my Bible and try to ponder on it through out the day. What troubles are you facing? Is your hope making you glad? Are you being patient in time of trouble? and most importantly, are you praying?

P.S. A week after these amazing "signs" I switched my major to Early Childhood Education, with a minor in my old major-Human Development and Family Studies. Let the journey begin! 

Don't judge a book by it's cover.

I like to think of myself as a very non-judgemental person, but today that thought was put to test.


The saying "Don't judge a book by it's cover"...is simply saying..."Don't judge a person by their appearance because there is a whole lot to get to know on the inside." So, today. I'm in this packaging class with like 9 billion people, it's a huge lecture hall. Gives me a panic attack just walkin in. Well anyways, we were put into group for our final project and today we found out who the group members were. Well, let me back up....The teacher had set up signs around the room of the group number/members and she told us to all march around like zoo animals until we found the right place. Sounds like a fun activity at 10 on a Tuesday, right? Wrong. Guess who was the last zoo animal to find their spot? ME. Everyone had found their name and here I was going around to each one, one more time to see if I saw my last name. Here I am, turning beat red and feeling eyes stare.


Once I get to my seat, my head down in embarrassment..I look up to see this girl in dread locks, looking like she hadn't slept in days; this guy that hasn't showered in 2 weeks, and a boy that was definitely a freshmen...and definitely couldn't speak 3 words in English. Now Stop. Think of what I just said....How Judgemental of me!? Right away I thought, oh great....In another group where I will have to do all of the work again.


Fast forward a few minutes....and these people are spitting out answers, organizing meeting times, and giving great ideas! Here I was...the girl that couldn't even read her own name on a sheet, judging them by their appearance alone. Assuming each of their personalities based on what I saw on the surfice.


I hope that the next time I'm faced with this test, or you are in a similiar situation, we remember every book has a story to tell.


Stephanie Katherine

Home Sweet Home

    After a busy week of college life, there is no feeling quite like the one, knowing you are going home for the weekend. I never really realized how good I had it. The moment I walk in, my cat is there to greet me, there is some sort of treat on the counter, and usually the smell of supper cooking. Not to mention, that when I take a shower... I don't have to wear flip flops!


     Speaking of unique feelings...how about the feeling of "growing up." First you go through high school counting down the days until you move away, and once you get there....you count the days until you get to go home. Grass is always greener.... One of the smallest things that I missed about home, was knowing everyone. My friend from college was driving me home one weekend, and when we got into alma center she said to me "how do you know every person that is driving passed us?" That was something that I would have never noticed, but I instantly smiled. It's just something only the people from Alma Center can understand. I love that small town feel. Comfort.


Don't get me wrong, I've met a lot of great people! College is fun & I'm right where I'm supposed to be. Where I grew up will just always give me that special feeling...something we all miss from time to time. A little girl at the preschool (where I work) was sitting in the corner with her head in her hands & when I walked up to her I noticed she was crying. I immeditely said "what's wrong sweetie?" she looked up and said "I just miss my mom." Now, a lot of the time the kids are crying over things that I know are "silly" but this really touched my heart. I knelt down by her and said "I know just how you feel. I miss my mom sometimes too." Right then, a little girl came up and said "Come on, let's go play."


Sometimes all you need is a good cry and an understanding friend.


-Stephanie Katerine

One day at a time. 2/9/2012

     This past month I was introduced to Pinterest. Shocker right? It seems that everyone under the sun has discovered the fabulous site! Well anyways, before I knew it 5 hours passed by and soon I had a board full of pins that I found so exciting and there sat my homework. One of those pins, was a new hair style that I was dying to try out. It came from a women's blog where she talked about her fashion, life, and funny stories. I was so inspired. Kind of like sharing parts of your diary with others. Long story short, here I am.

      When I had to think of something to name my blog, I froze. I wanted something "catchy" but not "cheesy," something "unique" but not "weird." Then I started doubting myself thinking, well what if I am boring...If I'm not "good" at it. Then I found myself taking a deep breath and remembered how much I had enjoyed the woman's blog about her new hair style, and how it had brought joy to my day (plus I'm always up for a new hair idea). Which is why I came up with Deep Breath. Happy Thoughts. Simply meaning, everyone, including myself, forgets to step back, and enjoy.

& like a wise teacher once told me- "Carpe Diem--Seize the day."

     I love the saying "Not everyday is good, but there is something good in everyday," and that's exactly my goal for this blog. It'll be a way for me not just to go through the motions of everyday, but to really think about the "good" and of course sometimes the "bad" and reflect what that day taught me, and hopefully I can open your eyes along the way too.

    So for tomorrow keep in mind, Deep Breath. Happy Thoughts. . .  ENJOY.

-Stephanie Katherine

"Let your hope make you glad, Be patient in time of trouble, and never stop praying"
Romans 12:12